When I'm Up...I'm UP!!!

Hello, you wonderful people out there!

Smokey jane is the name....positivity is my game.
My wish is that it stays this way...FOREVER.

For the past three days, I have been on a natural high. I've been energetic, laughing and joking with random people I see in the stores and on the streets. So peculiar that I ever felt suicidal just under a week ago..
Thus is the life of a bipolar schizophrenic supermodel.

As of now, I am on my bed with a pillow under my tummy just how I like it. My laptop has about five tabs open specifically geared towards prosperity articles and potiential clients, whereas under a week ago, I was driven toward people who have killed themselves and what they have done to change the world by their death.
Polar opposition to the furthest extremities!
At this particular moment, I have no need to call the suicide hotline and cry quietly over the phone. I have all the time in the world to listen to the rain with delight and munch on some seedless grapes while contemplating another momentous power-move towards my own prosperity.

In reality, I feel like such a fool to feel the way I felt earlier.
What did I do right this time?
How can I keep this feeling?
Am I doomed to a dangerous emotional rollercoaster for the rest of my life?
Will I finally succumb to artificial means of medication through prescribed anti-depressants?
Was it all a mental illusion....a medically-labeled cashcow brewing from the stress of  making a living in the world?
Do I truly have full control of my feelings and emotions?

All I know is that I am truly scared...and I hate to admit that have no idea if I may or may not have full control over my feelings and emotions...
Do you?